Written by Monkey Woods
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Sunday, 21 December 2008

image for Dennis Wise Set For Leeds United Return
Dennis Wise standing on a dog turd

Leeds United, the fallen giants of Yorkshire football, have today sacked manager Gary McAllister after a run of five successive defeats has seen them slide down League One. Initial reports say McAlister's replacement is likely to be former manager Dennis Wise.

Wise left Elland Road last January to become the Executive Director of Football at Newcastle United, but recent events which saw Kevin Keegan leave St James' Park, have made Wise an unpopular figure on Tyneside, and it's thought he would welcome a move back to Yorkshire.

Standing only 3 feet 4 inches tall, Wise usually sits on a couple of cushions at Newcastle, but Leeds fans would love to have the little fella back in place of McAllister.

Leeds need to improve quickly, having recently lost to non-League Histon in what must have been the most embarrassing moment in their history - apart from all the others, that is.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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