Written by Monkey Woods
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Saturday, 22 November 2008

image for Arsenal Former Captain William Gallas Speaks To His Manager In French
Le singe est dans l'arbre

William Gallas, the loose-lipped captain of Arsenal, has resigned the role, after telling Gunners' boss Arsene Wenger that the team lacked guts, that he hated his boss, and that the writing had been on the wall since the home defeat to Hull City.

The pair had heated words yesterday after training.

Gallas allegedly told Wenger:

"Nous étions terribles. Nous étions une disgrâce. J'avais honte d'être un joueur d'Arsenal.
Je déteste ce club et je vous déteste!"

None of this was very nice, as it was in French. Both Gallas and Wenger are Frenchmen, and the Arsenal manager will have had no difficulty at all, in deciphering the harsh words spoken by his captain.

Gallas went on to say that his team were completely outclassed by Hull in the 2-1 home reverse, and that they had been lucky the margin had been only one goal, so superior were the Tigers.

He said:

"Ils étaient autant de mieux que nous. Le singe est dans l'arbre. Bon."

Wenger responded by saying:

"Ceci est le stylo de ma tante. Bon."

Hull City manager Phil Brown, who doesn't speak French, said:

"Aye, well, so to speak."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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