Written by Monkey Woods
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Friday, 17 October 2008

image for Chinese Grand Prix Latest: Lewis Hamilton Worried About Smog
Smog Levels: not too bad yesterday

Lewis Hamilton, the British Formula 1 racing driver currently leading the race for the drivers' title, has expressed reservations ahead of Sundays Grand Prix here in Shanghai, about the Smog, and his ability to see through it.

Smog is a big problem in China, and on some days, it gets so bad, that huge human traffic jams develop in built-up and downtown areas, causing chaos and fights.

The confusion was highlighted in the Olympic Games recently, when marathon runner Paula Radcliffe got lost in the smog, and her eyes became so itchy, that she couldn't stop crying.

Hamilton told journalists this morning that the smog was bound to be a problem if he ended up losing the race, but no problem at all if he wins.

The British driver leads the championship by five points from Felipe Massa of BMW, and could win the title outright on Sunday in one of several scenarios, all of which are so complicated, I can't be arsed to try to explain them.

Hamilton came through the qualifying session today in first place, and will start in Pole position on Sunday. Despite finishing with sore eyes, the 23-year-old laughed-off suggestions that he had been crying, saying:

"I've been peeling some onions."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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