The Ghost of Charles Dickens has challenged the Ghost of Christmas Past to a no-holes barred, bare-knuckle fist fight.
"Dead Dickens has simply had enough with the Ghost of Christmas Past 'dissin and bad-moufin' 'im" a close spectre friend of the pair said.
Another insider ghoul said "The Ghost of Christmas Past never liked how Dickens potrayed him in his popular page turning book 'Christmas Carol'. The Ghost of Christmas Past vowed when Dickens died he was going to kick his arse, but it simply has been empty threats for the last one hundred and fifty years".
'Dickens's Ghost in good shape'
Dickens said yesterday "I have been looking over my ghostly shoulder for centuries, but I will look no more... yes the scallywag can bring it on. I haven't duffed anyone up, since I decked the Ghost of William Shakespeare, but I have been training and I'm in frigging good shape".
'Ghost of Christmas Present defends friend'
The 'Ghost of Christmas Past' was unavailable for comment yesterday, but his best friend 'Ghost of Christmas Present' stated "In ' A Christmas Carol' Dickens makes the Ghost of Christmas Past look like some sort of 'nonce' and he took it real bad at the time. He has been holding a grudge for many years and not moving on with his dead life. Personally I think that it is simply part of being a ghost in the public eye, sometimes people write shit about you, it goes with the territory".
'Baby featured Casper speaks out'
Celebrity kiddy ghost 'Casper' when told the news of the impending 'ghost punch-up' said "Oh dear I wish all ghosts could be friendly, like me. I don't like fighting it scares me, do you want to watch my 'High School Musical' dvd ?... I also have 'Hanna Montana' it's very good".
The fight is scheduled to take place on UK TV, 8pm, 15th October on Channel Four, Channel Four +1, E4, More 4, E4 +1 and Nuts TV where the host will be the ghost of a big-tittied woman possibly Chesty Morgan or Lola the dead star of 'Eurotrash' .