Written by Jalapenoman
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Friday, 15 August 2008

image for Mark Spitz Challenges Michael Phelps to Race
This is not Phelps or Spitz, but neither look this good in a bikini.

Upset with the huge success of Michael Phelps at this year's Olympic games and the fact that all of his one time world records have fallen, former swimmer Mark Spitz has decided to come out of retirement and challenge Michael Phelps to a race.

Spitz won seven gold medals in 1972 in Munich, setting seven world records in the process. None of those records still stands. In fact, none of those times would have even qualified someone for the semi-finals in any of the races this month.

Bart Kimmer was chosen by Spitz as the referee for the challenge (which Phelps has yet to accept). He laid out the ground rules for the race:

"Michael will be in the water, no diving start, while Mark will be on the side of the pool. At the sound of the gun, Phelps will begin swimming towards the other end, using only his right arm for stroking and his left leg for kicking. Spitz, meanwhile, will move along the edge, using his walker to assist him, as he tries to beat Phelps to the other end."

"Michael will go 150 meters, while Mark will have to go a whole 50."

"It should be close."

He also announced that the race will take place at 3:00 p.m.. "That's when most of the seniors are up from their naps at the home and before they head for the buffet at Golden Corral."

"The water aerobics group and the water volleyball group are not using the pool then either."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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