Written by Walt
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Friday, 4 July 2008

image for Chinese Nix Olympic Games for Sarkozy
"Congrats on the Bruni babe & way to go Nikky boy"

China Daily, Beijing, wrote that "Chinese people do not want French President Nicolas Sarkozy to attend the opening ceremony of the Beijing Olympics," & they cited an internet survey as the source for this will of the masses. The Chinese Foreign Ministry stated they do not want any "politicization of the Olympic Games" or related meddling, so Sarkozy can stay away with his human rights opinions.

Conversely, George W. Bush, 43rd President of the USA, is welcome in Beijing for the opening of the games--and his spokesperson has indicated that Bush might attend.

Noted columnist Ziff Nada, a guru of pundits & self-described "maximum leader of wordsmiths," briefly reviewed the political records of Bush xliii & Sarkozy, much to the detriment of the US president. Countries invaded: Bush 2, Sarkozy none. Civilians bombed, killed & maimed: Bush 650,000 or so, Sarkozy none. Threats to destabilize other nations: Bush 17 (8 at the United Nations), Sarkozy none. International treaties abrogated: Bush 9 (including the Geneva Accords), Sarkozy none. Number of times locked out of the Great Hall of the Palace: Bush 1, Sarkozy none.

Mr. Nada is convinced that Sarkozy is far less politically radioactive than Bush, whose talent for making international citizens angry is legendary--a worldwide poll on where Mr. Bush should go, or be sent, could turn out to be very interesting, perhaps quaint.

And finally, the notable columnist carefully noted that Mr. Sarkozy is married to & travels with Carla Bruni, which should suggest non-political ideas altogether. Perhaps the Chinese government could ask the French 1st lady to wear a tennis uniform & march with the French Olympic Team as they enter "The Birds Nest" stadium, as Nada suggested, & lead them in singing "La Marseillaise." Better yet, Bruni may be willing to organize & lead an informal Olympic competition for "String Bikini & Thong" teams in order to boost the worldwide television ratings. The old-time columnist finally pointed out that the promotional copy writes itself. The bikini contests would be an overall "Bra-ha-ha" with elements of "Tit-for-Tat," and an occasional "Tempest in a D-Cup" overfilling the headlines. Let those games begin . . . !

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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