Written by Monkey Woods
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Monday, 23 June 2008

image for Lewis Hamilton and Tiger Woods Are Twins Separated At Birth
Tiger or Lewis - not sure which

There was a surprise for motor racing and golf fans alike today, when it was revealed that Lewis Hamilton, the Formula 1 racing driver, and golfer Tiger Woods are twin brothers.

Initial suggestions claimed that the two sportsmen were, in fact, the same person, but subsequent evidence turned up to show that the two had competed in separate events at the same time, and that they could not, therefore, be the same entity.

The two have strenuoulsy denied the claims, saying they are ridiculous, and that the rumour has been started by someone who thinks all black people look the same.

Hamilton and Woods, who, uncannily do look the same, were 'outed' by TheSpoof.com reporter Duncan Whitehead, 40, who has also claimed that the Formula 1 driver had avoided a tense and uncomfortable play-off at the 19th hole with his sibling by reaching the chequered flag of the vulva first.

They were then sold off into slavery, but their successful streaks couldn't be kept in check for long, and they have both risen to the pinnacles of their respective sports.

Said Whitehead:

"I can't tell them apart!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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