Written by mumcoyote
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Topics: NASCAR

Monday, 26 May 2008

image for Briscoe Aplogizes for Danica Crash

On Sunday, during the 92nd running of the Indianapolis 500, Ryan Briscoe crashed into Danica Patrick and knocked her out of the race. Enraged, Danica marched over to Briscoe's crew and tried to throw it down with them until security came to get her.

Before security got there, Briscoe's crew tried to calm down the firey Patrick. Some of these phrases include: "You weren't going that fast anyway", "You were getting embarassed so we did you a favor", "At least your face is still pretty", "You won that race in Japan that no Americans saw or really cared about", and "Women shouldn't be driving in the Indy 500 anyway, this extra time will be good to sew your clothing line while you watch".

Surprisingly none of these things made Danica less angry.

Afterwards Briscoe made a private apology to Patrick saying, "I am sorry for accidentally ramming you into pit road. Don't stress out, you now have a whole new year to learn how to drive and build a car that doesn't run like a mini van. And c'mon, you weren't really going to win."

Despite being incidentally insulted numerous times, Danica Patrick has resolved to look towards next season or maybe even NASCAR where she hopes the men will be more polite, and less dimwitted.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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