In a shock development on the last day of the season, Manchester United were deducted four points by the Football Association for arrogance throughout the season. As a result, the humble servants of Chelsea were rightfully crowned premiership champions.
Alex Ferguson, who has been stripped of his title by the queen for his part in the arrogance scandal, was livid. "We are not arrogant - we are just better than anyone else. How dare anyone tell me what to do."
Asked why they had delayed the decision to dock the points until this point of the season, the FA said: "We are incompetent and disorganised and should not be in charge of the nation's game. I mean for heaven's sake, it was us who appointed MacLaren. However, as our governance arrangements mean we can do what the hell we like, who gives a toss? Fergie had it coming."
Chelsea were cock a hoop - and no one was going to talk about the rumours that Roman Abramovich had slipped a few million quid Brian Barwick's way.