Written by Gialarossi
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Thursday, 24 April 2008

image for Terry defends Drogba - mascot in stable condition.
Only minor brain damage suffered by Michelle!

John Terry has launched a strong defence of the Chelsea teams actions on Saturday which left one of the team mascots in a stable but critical condition in a west London Hospital.

There was no sign of the mayhem to follow as Chelsea and Manchester United walked onto the Stamford Bridge turf to a rousing reception. The atmosphere was tense as Chelsea went into today's game needing a win to keep the title race alive. And it didn't take long for things to spill over as the Manchester United mascot for the day, 8 year old Michelle Smith, went to shake the hand of her favourite striker Didier Drogba.

Upon contact, Drogba collapsed onto the turf, rolling around screaming while clutching his face. A furious John Terry jumped to his team mates defence by booting Michelle up the jacksie.

As she fell to the ground, the rest of the Chelsea squad made certain that Michelle was not going to be standing up anytime soon. After a studding from Michael Essien, an elbow to the ribs by Carvalio the sustained attack was finished off by a classic WWE style pile-driver to the face from Avram Grant.

As medics rushed to the aid of the hapless 8 year old, John Terry defended his team mates actions:

"It was totally un-called for. You could see she did it deliberately. We're like a family, so we were only protecting one of our own. It's a mans game, I'm sure once she's out of hospital we'll all sit down and have a laugh about it. But we've got to stamp out that kind of behaviour in our game otherwise we're going to lose players like Didier."

Drogba meanwhile was airlifted to the nearest military Hospital and some sources from Stamford Bridge fear that this latest injury scare could signal the end of Drogba's career. Rumours surfaced immediately that the Ivory Coast Ladies League were tabling a bid for the Chelsea sharp shooter.

Meanwhile, Michelle Smith is expected to be released by Doctors next month with only minor brain damage. Drogba and Chelsea have only launched a civil case against Michelle and have agreed to drop criminal proceedings against her as a gesture of good-will.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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