Written by The Pikey Dentist
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Monday, 14 April 2008

image for Cardiff Guaranteed Place in UEFA Cup
Cardiff City fans celebrate their right to be English

Cardiff City FC have been thrown another life line to play in EUFA Cup next season, official sources have confirmed.

After an emergency meeting convened at the Welsh Assembly earlier this morning, AM's discussed the possibility of recindering Cardiff's capital status and becoming a county of England.

Most AM and council members have welcomed the idea as living with the status of Welshness has become a bit of an embarrassment for the city.

Abdul al Djefi, a resident of the Roath area said "I am very pleased with this proposal. Perhaps now we can get rid of the silly signs in two languages. It is a big deal when my family of 36 all have this confusion of where we are. I paid good money to come to England then find out I was robbed and end up in this place."

Other areas of Wales have not only welcomed the move, they have started petitions already to have Cardiff removed from their nation.

Dai Morris, a karaoke king from Swansea had this to say.

"Personally I can't fucking wait! Cardiff never wanted to be the capital in the first place. And they never wanted to have an assembly. Why the fuck didn't they leave the Wales sooner that's what I want to know!"

This opinion was echoed in most of Wales, particularly in the town of Caernarfon who feel they would again have capital status and concentrate on flooding Offer's Dyke.

When asked by a leading political analyst, Welsh Assembly leader Rhodri Morgan commented on the decision.

"We feel that Cardiff has been held back by the negative imagery associated with Wales and has long been disassociated from the rest of the UK despite our over proportionate ethnic repopulation programme. The deciding factor in this though was the whole argument of Cardiff City football club being allowed to play in Europe next season.

"By becoming a county in England, Cardiff will automatically be playing in the UEFA cup next season. They are other benefits too, such as being able to support the England cricket team without feeling guilty and have a decent national football team for once."

Mr Morgan declined to comment further when asked his opinion regarding Jonathan Edwards signing for the WRU for 3 years and proceeded to learn the words of "Swing Low".

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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