Written by Maditude
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Saturday, 29 March 2008

image for Drug Testing to be Conducted in Special Olympics Games
A Special Olympian awaits his test results.

The Special Olympics Board announced today that its athletes are being tested for performance-enhancing substances. While there yet to be any signs that any cheating has occurred, they wanted to safeguard against the possibility of cheating.

The following statement was released on the matter:

"Although there is no reason to think that any of the Special Olympians are artificially enhancing their performances, we felt it was vital to make sure our athletes are clean. It is important to maintain the integrity of the Special Olympics, both for participants and for spectators."

As of this date, no athlete has tested positive for any enhancement substances, but a Brazilian athlete appeared to be drunk.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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