Written by queen mudder
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Wednesday, 30 January 2008

image for Naked Sharapova signs up for Valentine's Day Hustler centerfold
A close-up from one of the magazine shots

Florida - (Cheeky Ass Mess): Russian-born blonde tennis ace Maria Sharapova has signed a $5 million contract to appear naked in a ten-page centerfold spread for Hustler magazine according to reports.

The Mario Testino-shot sequence shows the luscious six foot grand slam champion in various stages of undress, casually dropping her panties as she leaves a cheering Wimbledon Center Court maximum capacity audience, losing her brassiere in a very steamy men's changing room at Flushing Meadows and slowly applying all-over body oil to her lithe tanned naked limbs in the open air at Stade de Roland Garros.

"Just everyday shots of what she might be doing at any given moment at home!" her agent said, wistfully, today.

The barely twenty year-old pneumatic ball-smasher had successfully fended off Playboy and Penthouse bids of a "paltry and insulting" $1 million according to her agent who later confirmed that it took little persuasion for Hustler "to see sense" about the $5 million deal.

The pièce de résistance of the entire montage is of Maria straddling a two litre Harley Davidson while completely stark naked save for a pair of silver-spurred black Dolce & Gabbana snakeskin boots and a five hundred carat diamond bracelet gleaming in the blazing sunshine on a Malibu beach.

"You can see from the look of wanton pleasure on her slightly parted scarlet semi-swollen lips that she must be thinking about the last time she pleasured the man of her dreams....." the magazine caption reads.

Roger Federer is 26.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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