Written by Bill Skywalker
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Topics: Alex Ferguson

Friday, 18 January 2008

image for Sir Alex Admits to Drink Problem!
"Another G&T Mr Ferguson?"

Sir Alex Ferguson, the Manchester United manager, admitted today in a tearful interview that he has a severe drink problem.

Although this is the first time he has admitted it in public, many see it as no surprise, saying that the clues were already there. Evidence of this was that he had a red nose and was Scottish.

He also fanned the flames further more when he ludicrously announced that Cristiano Ronaldo "doesn't dive anymore" and that he is "such a nice, charming lad" whilst being under the influence of alcohol and custard creams.

The wily old manager has sought to seek help by getting advice from the likes of George Best.

"I'll give him a ring. He knew how to sort out his life when it went off the rails. Mind you, haven't heard from him in a while."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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