Written by the ister
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Topics: Drugs, John Cena

Friday, 11 January 2008

image for John Cena taking Drugs
John Cena's hand sign

It was absolutely and unequivocally confirmed today (honestly) that 3-Time WWE Champion and 1-Time US Champion John Cena has been using drugs during matches. 3,000 kg of a heroin-cocaine drug combination was found in John Cena's blood stream during a surprise drugs test.

When asked about the drugs, Cena said,"Is it wrong to chill out and be high after an intense night?"

Well, apparently John, it is.

John Cena is now in custody and will be on trial in due course.

A close friend of Cena, and fellow wrestler, told us, "I always thought it was odd when after power-slamming me, John would whip out a syringe and shoot up in the middle of the ring. I don't know why I didn't realize earlier to be honest."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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