Written by Rotten Apple
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Topics: Farting

Monday, 12 November 2007

image for Teenager Wins Place in Guinness Book of World Records for Farting
"Oh geez, that was a good one!"

Clyde Snodgrass, of Columbus Ohio has set a new Guinness World Record for the "Highest Number of Farts in a One Hour Period." The 17 year old high school student trained for six months in preparation for the competition which was held this past weekend in Chicago.

"I've been living on a diet of sweet potatoes, cheese, pinto beans, and chocolate milk," said Clyde as he squeezed off a short burst. "Ahh, that was sweet! Now, where were we? Oh, yes. A lot of people think that food is the whole secret to farting. Food does play an important part, but when you're going for the Guinness World Record, you've got to have good control. I ought to know: I've sure spoiled a lot of good underwear!"

After the competition, the triumphant teenager returned to high school in Columbus.

Although Clyde has lost any possibility of denying responsibility for the large number of "mystery farts" in the classrom, he has become a lot more popular since he began sharing with friends the 1,000 coupons he won from Taco Bell for free bean burritos.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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