Written by queen mudder
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Tuesday, 4 September 2007

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A straight sets thrashing awaits Andy Roddick at Flushing Meadows

Flushing Meadows - (Ass Mess): Bookmakers are going crazy offering odds of 1-5 on number one seed Roger Federrer wiping the floor with Andy Roddick in Wednesday's quarter-finals of the US Open at Flushing Meadows.

"Sure, I'm delighted at the opportunity to thrash him shitless at the quarter finals this year," a laid-back Federer laughed today.

"Last year it was almost kinda tough, having to teach him a lesson or two in the championship final match itself," the world number one seed added.

"I guess I'm looking at a 6-0, 6-0, 6-1 walkover," Federer smiled mischievously, "but if I'm feeling really generous and the sponsors ass-lick a teensy bit more, sure - I might spin it out a little.

"Who knows?

"6-4, 6-4, 6-1? I could be up for that, if only to let thye man keep a bit of self-respect you know.

"What I'm really focused on is setting up a finals needle-match against Nadal.

"And Andy will probably oblige with a little prep game ahead of the semis where I usually like to find my feet and polish up a couple tricks I'm keeping up my sleeve for the Spaniard.

"So take those 1-5 odds with my blessing. By the time the game opens they'll be out to 1-8, maybe 1-10.

"And don't feel sorry for Roddick. He's had his chance. And he'll still stay loaded even after I've obliterated him tomorrow in straight sets."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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