Victoria "Posh" Beckham was photographed picking her nose and eating it, after refusing to eat at the pre-match dinner of husband David's latest match for LA Galaxy at the MacDonald's Burger Stadium, in [her words] "some God-awful hick-town in the middle of the bloody desert!"
Beckham's team-mates were said to be shocked, with 400-pound defender Ty "Must Try Harder" Harden saying "It was disgusting ... all them lovely burgers going to waste!"
Real Salt Lake midfielder Chris "Chubby" Brown added "Hey, more burgers for the rest of us!"
The game ended 0-0, with barely any action as both teams struggled to move. When a section of the crowd started singing "Who ate all the pies?", players from both teams were seen raising their hands.