Written by Monkey Woods
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Thursday, 12 July 2007

image for Port Vale Sign Two Robbies
The two Robbies getting to know each other yesterday

League One side Port Vale made an audacious swoop into the transfer market yesterday when they secured the services of two Robbies - ex-Liverpool, Man City, Leeds and England striker Robbie Fowler, and the ex-Take That and current drug-crazed popstar homo Robbie Williams.

Fowler is reputed to have struck a deal that will cost the club £10,000-a-week, and Williams one that will provide him with all the 'coloured candy' his little heart could desire.

A Port Vale fan since he was in nappies, which he sometimes still wears, Williams has always dreamt of playing for his favourite team, and is sure to be a big asset 'around the midriff', although he's also well-known for 'getting stuck in at the back'.

Vale manager Martin Foyle told fans on the club's official website:

"Robbie Fowler will score an awful lot of goals for us this season, whilst that other pansy dipshit is bound to bring a few more through the turnstiles, even if it's just to see how gayly spaced-out he can get."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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