Miami, Florida, U.S.A. - In a surprising game that left spectators baffled, Anna Kournikova served up boyfriend Enrique Iglesias' heart today in what was consider a Valentine's Day horror tennis spectacle.
Enrique was heard singing "I'm not in love, it's just a phase that I'm going through..." as Anna batted the heartless singer's organ across the court.
Prior to the game Anna mentioned something about "that Latin jerk really paying for it THIS time" - a reference to some unknown event that occurred earlier in the day.
A spokesperson for Mr. Iglesias explained - "Anna's always early for things... which presented a problem for Enrique this morning as he was - um - entertaining a friend for breakfast when Ms. Kournikova burst into his hotel room."
On a lighter note, Kournikova's manager commented on how the extra weight of the pumping heart had really strengthened Anna's back hand.
Julio Iglesias, Enrique's father, calmly offered "Well, boys will be boys... and now that Enrique is no longer with us, rest assured that I will PERSONALLY make sure Anna is very well taken care of."