Written by Monkey Woods
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Tuesday, 1 May 2007

image for John Terry In New Storms...Yawn
Gabby's jaw fell open...

Chelsea captain John Terry is at the centre of a Royal Storm this morning after declaring that he fancies Prince Harry's girlfriend Chelsy Davy.

Speaking on BBC1's new Inside Sport programme last night, Terry said that he'd "love to manhandle Chelsy one day".

As surprised host Gabby Logan's jaw fell open, the England captain realised he'd made an error, and tried to correct it by stammering that he'd meant to say that he'd love to manage Chelsea one day. This, however, was an even more unlikely suggestion, and the camera crew filming the scene fell about in fits of laughter.

The damage done, Logan tried to deflect the contoversy by changing the subject to 'Chelsea's rivalry with Tottenham', but succeeded only in crashing the show into a Jade Goody-style racism accident, when Terry mentioned his spat with Ledley King last November.

King, the Spurs defender and nephew of the famous LAPD- beaten-up Sir Rodney King, was the recipient of a hail of racial insults from (allegedly) none other than the defendant defender Mr Terry, who was despatched from the field in disgrace by referee Graham Poll.

Terry now denies the racist allegations, and told Logan:

"Although I can run very fast, I'm no racist."


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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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