Chelsea's over-rated housewife, Frank Lampard, has today poured his heart out to local reporters about Manchester United's advantage over his club.
'United have played before us in nearly every game, and it's just not fair' he cried.
'I know we have played before them for the last two seasons, but that was ok because it's us.'
After one reporter sniggered, Frank was reported to have thrown his hangbag at the man, and claimed he 'would sue for bullying'.
Chelsea manager Jose Mourinho then called the reporter a 'son of a whore' in Portugese while trying to calm Lampard down with a baby rattle.