Written by Jalapenoman
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Topics: Basketball, NCAA

Sunday, 11 March 2007

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The NCAA double dribbled on this year's brackets

The NCAA has announced the brackets for their annual March Madness tournament, but with a twist. All 64 teams in the tournament will come from the Big East, ACC, SEC, Big Ten, Pac 10, and Big Twelve. All other conference winners and represtentatives from the WAC, Mountain West, Colonial, Ivy League, and other insignificant conferences will be forced to participate in a 32 team play in bracket. The winner of that tournament will play the lowest rated Big Ten team for the right to enter the big dance.

Representatives from Nevada, Memphis, Gonzaga, and Air Force, who have all spent significant time in the top 15 this season but are not in major conferences, were all upset at the decision. One fan at the C-USA tournament screamed at the cameras "are you afraid to play us?"

"This just ain't right," said coach Stu Ralphson of Western Tennessee Tech, winners of the Cotton Pickin' Southern Conference regular season and tournament. "What happened to bracket busters and Cinderella teams and such? Them boys is gettin' too big fer their britches. We done went 28 and 3 and we get left out so they can let Big Twelve losers in because they have better strenght of schedule and higher RPI!"

Billy Packer and Dick Vitale, on the other hand, love the new shape of the tournament. Said Vitale, "This is wonderful, baby. You got all the diaper dandies and none of the mid-majors (or whatever you want to call the schools that don't count) to ruin things. We took a lesson from the BCS and got it all right this time."

All viewers from the states of New Mexico, Utah, Wyoming, Montana, Idaho, North and South Dakota, Alaska, Hawaii, Vermont, Delaware, and several others have vowed to boycott the tournament and create their own next year. Those teams chosen to play in the play in game/tournament have all elected to play in an expanded NIT.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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