Mourinho has announced he will happily stay at Stamford Bridge providing he has the support of Chelsea Clinton, daughter of former White House lecher and his often chilly wife, the senator.
Mourinho said that it's hard enough having a romance language name among all these Englishmen and mad dogs without the support of a love interest. "If Chelsea has even half of her father's "inheritance" that girl will keep me warm through many a cold, North sea winter", Mourinho drooled.
When asked if only Chelsea will do, Mourinho replied: "Not necessarily... I hear New PM and Mrs Brown have a lovely daughter but if she admires Gandhi and his celibacy as much as her Mom and Pop then , she's out!".