Written by Jaggedone
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Tuesday, 8 March 2016

image for Sharapova, a grunt too many!
the reasons for her grunts are obvious! Sharapova only has her tennis balls!

Maria Sharapova, Nr 1 world's best female tennis grunter, has admitted her secret weapon, screaming like a pregnant moose on the global tennis courts, was caused by using viagra to get her horny (Famous Louis van Gaal pep talk comment to his superstar losers) before going on court!

Her sponsors, Nike, Porsche, Tag Heuer & Co, failed to see the funny side of Maria's outing, and blew her away. It seems as though Sharapova will only be allowed to use the infamous drug whilst shooting porno films for the internet and her distraught fans, who fear her days of grunting in public are over (Thank the heavens)!

Ex, Nr 1 grunter, Monica Seles, who started the whole damn grunting thing, told the New York Times, "I never used viagra to get horny before grunting, and anyway I'm so ugly it never attracted male tennis players anyway!"

Serena Williams, also quite a heavy grunter (and heavyweight boxer), is quite happy that Maria has at last told the truth about her drug abuse and has promised never to grunt on a tennis court again. She will however, continue to wear flesh coloured knickers, so her male fans will not require a dose of viagra whilst watching her replays on the internet. She prefers to believe her many male fans do not require such drugs because her buttocks are like a double dose of viagra anyway!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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