Written by Karen Fish
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Friday, 5 September 2014

image for Miley Cyrus Dominican Republic Ban Sidetracks Golfing NATO Leaders

The Miley Cyrus ban by the Dominican Republic is sidetracking the conversation at the NATO summit currently being held at the Celtic Manor Golf Resort in Newport, Wales, the home of the 2010 Ryder Cup won by Europe 14 ½ to 13 ½ when Hunter Mahan yip chipped the Ryder Cup away in the anchor match with Graeme McDowell from just off the 17th green.

NATO Chief Anders Fogh Rasmussen has brought in famed golfing sports psychologist Robert "Bob" Rotella and golf's short game guru Dave Pelz on the eve of the 2014 Ryder Cup to conduct chipping seminars from just off 17 green for the world luminaries trying to pull the world out of the burn.

Journalists embedded on golf carts have noticed that President Obama, David Cameron, Vladimir Putin, Hassan Rouhani, Ayatollah Khamenei, King Abdullah, the other King Abdullah and Dustin Johnson haven't said a word about the Ukraine, or ISIS, or Iran's new test of their first 100 Megaton Nuclear bomb; instead our world leaders have become obsessed with the recent ban of Miley Cyrus' world wide Bangerz tour by the Dominican Republic.

President Obama was overheard saying: "I cannot believe the sheer chutzpah of Danilo Medina! Does Danny want King Felipe VI and I to colonize him again!? This nightmare has really affected my putting. I think I'm getting the yips. I'm thinking of switching to a belly putter. Aren't they banning that next year? Does that apply to amateurs? Am I an amateur? Hasn't that idiot heard of the Cuban Missile Crisis? This game is hard enough without me worrying about the Domincan Republic banning Miley Cyrus every time I take the club back. I'll wipe that guy off the face of the Earth!"

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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