Written by Jaggedone
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Thursday, 24 April 2014

image for Moyes tells van Gaal he's Double Dutch!
They should have chosen "The special one" in the first place!

Ex-Man Utd manager has been in touch with the favourite to take his place, Nederland coach, Louis van Gaal, and told him, and I quote;

"You must be f++kíng mad laddie!"

King Louis replied in his best kings Dutch,

"Gottverdomme klootzak!"

Moyes also claimed that van Gaal only speaks "double Dutch" and would have trouble chatting up the tea lady that ex-manager, Tommy Docherty, bunked in the brooom cupboard a long time ago and Louis once again replied:

"Gottverdomme ik hou alleen von jonge boobies!" Boobies one of the words of english in his limited vocabulary!

Moyes also gave van Gaal a few tips in how to deal with interim manager and United legend, Ryan Giggs, and here are just a couple;

1)Don't let your daughter-in-law near the changing rooms, there's a Welsh Wizard lurking!
2) Make sure Giggs is always in front of you because he loves a back stab or two whilst you are smiling at the cameras!

Louis again replied in his best pigeon English,

"Fuck off klootzak, it is King Louis time, boo, boo be doo!"

More Moyes's as they seep out of the cesspot called "The theatre of Nachtmerries!"

Translation; Theatre of nightmares!

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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