Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 3 March 2014

image for Charles Barkley Says That Kobe Bryant Needs To Hang Up His Jock Strap and Retire
Barkley says that Kobe needs to forget about ever dribbling the basketball again.

LOS ANGELES - TNT sports analyst Charles "The Fat Bro" Barkley was in LaLaLand visiting his friend Jay Leno who was recently fired from the Tonight Show.

Charles was asked by Buckaroo Kazoo with The Turnstile Review what he thought about the Los Angeles Lakers chances of making it to the NBA playoffs was.

Barkley took a bite out of his ham, turkey, salami, and roast beef sandwich and said that they have as much chance of getting to the playoffs as David Crosby has of slimming down to Woody Allen's weight.

Charles then said that the best thing that Kobe can do is to hang up his jock strap once and for all and retire from the NBA.

He noted that unless he does the Lakers fans are going to continue getting their hopes up and eventually getting the disappointment of their Left Coast lives.

SIDENOTE: When Kobe was told of Barkley's comments he made a face and said that Charles The Fat Brutha apparently hit his head on a palm tree and he is now acting as ignorant as that skanky blonde talk show host Chelsea "The Dumpster" Handler.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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