Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 12 February 2014

image for Kenyan Figure Skater Claims Simon Cowell Is The Father of Her Twin Boys
Mumbi Kagunda says that one day she hopes her twin boys appear on Kenyan Idol.

SOCHI, Russia - The Sochi Olympics have been rocked by a statement made by Kenya's lone figure skater Mumbi Kagunda.

The gorgeous 27-year-old skater is claiming that British music mogul Simon Cowell is the father of her twin boys Gakuro and Gatimu who are both 3-years-old.

Mumbi talked with a reporter for Russia's national news agency Vodkavich and stated that she first met Mr. Cowell when he visited Kenya back in 2009, on a trip to setup concert dates for a band he had discovered known as Camel Carl & The Desert Rag Headz.

At the time Mumbi was working as a public relations director for the Kenyan Board of Tourism. She said that right away when her and Simon's eyes met they both knew that there was something special there.

She said that Simon asked her if she was married. She replied that she was single and that she was most definitely available for dating.

The two went out to a local Hippoburger Diner and had a great time. She said that they dated for about a week before he left to return back to London.

Mumbi said that nine months later her twin boys Gakuru and Gatimu Cowell were born.

She said that she tried to contact Mr. Cowell but he never returned her calls.

SIDENOTE: Several reporters who have seen photos of Mumbi's twin boys say that they look exactly like little bitty versions of Simon Cowell especially dressed in black T-shirts like Simon wears.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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