DALLAS - The owner of the Dallas Cowboys Jerry Jones has gone on record as saying that he is tired of his team finishing 8-8 for the last three years.
Jones remarked to Dottie Bazooka with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily that he has spent billions of dollars on his team and he wants them to start winning and getting into the playoffs instead of the entire team sitting home and watching everyone else play in the playoffs.
The Cowboys owner commented to Miss Bazooka that he is so fed up with his team's lackadaisical play that he traveled to Lake Charles, Louisiana to consult with America's top voodoo woman Madam Lottie Jo Lafayette.
Jones said that he paid Ms. Lafayette a pretty good sum of money for her to cast one of her mumbo jumbo spells which will cause negative vibes to the Cowboys opponents for the upcoming season.
Jerry was asked by Dottie Bazooka if he didn't feel that voodoo could be considered a form of cheating. Jones laughed and said, "Sweety, it's like the ultimate cheaters New England Patriots Coach Bill Belichick and New Orleans Saints Coach Sean Peyton both said, 'Cheating is just an 8-letter word for winning.'"