Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 12 November 2013

image for The Tampa Bay Buccaneers Are No Longer Winless As They Beat The Miami Dolphins 22-19
One unidentified Dolphins player said they lost to the Buccaneers because of a voodoo magic spell

TAMPA BAY, Florida - The Buccaneers fans were totally ecstatic as their 0-8 team finally won its first game of the season.

The Buccaneers beat the Miami Dolphins by a score of 22-19. Many sports writers were quick to blame the loss on all of the Dolphins behind-the-scenes antics regarding suspended offensive guard Richie Incognito.

But Tampa Bay Coach Greg Schiano stated that the Dollies (Dolphins) can make whatever excuse they want but the bottom line is that they got beat.

Two of the Tampa Bay cheerleaders got so caught up in their teams victory that they actually started making out on the sidelines near the 40 yard marker.

A Raymond James Stadium security guard went up to them and told them to stop kissing on the sidelines and go and kiss out in the parking lot.

Buccaneers tight end Tom Crabtree (#84) was so happy at the Bucs first victory of the season that he took off his helmet and threw it up in the air.

Luckily it didn't hit anyone but Coach Schiano told him to go to the locker room or else run the risk of getting hit with a fine.

Meanwhile Dolphins Coach Joe Philbin was asked by a reporter with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily what he blamed the loss on. Coach Philbin shook his head and pointed to the scoreboard.

"I blame the loss on the fact that we scored 19 points and the Buccaneers scored 22."

Dolphins running back Marcus Thigpen (#34) was asked for a comment and he replied that he was in shock and could not talk.

Miami nose tackle Isaako Aaitui (#97) was also asked for his comment and he said that he was so upset that he was liable to bite the hell out of someone.

SIDENOTE: After the game the entire Buccaneers football team celebrated by going out to The Burger Mistress Bar & Grill.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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