College Station, TX - Troubled Heisman Trophy winner Johnny Manziel announced today that he has secured the advisory services of Curious George the monkey. Curious George, known as a Zen master within the sports world, will take control of Manziel's personal appearances and overall schedule outside of football. George will also provide guidance on any future endorsement deals.
"Johnny Football" Manziel has made a series of embarrassing mistakes following his banner season as the nation's best college football player. Curious is part of a larger team that hopes to turn Manziel's life into a series of children's activity books and a possible animated television series.
Curious George, no stranger to embarrassing situations, says that the Man with the Yellow Hat will be available for "fixing whatever the hell needs to be fixed, no questions asked".