Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 26 July 2013

image for The Chicago White Sox Are Being Pressured To Change Their Name
The Chicago White Sox have used that name since 1901. (Photo from the Oprah Winfrey Collection).

CHICAGO - There is some ill-winds blowing in the Windy City and a lot of it is swirling around baseball's U.S. Cellular Field, home of the south side boys, The Chicago White Sox.

According to a story which appeared in The Turnstile Review written by Buckaroo Kazoo, a Chicago organization calling itself Chicago Educators for the Use of Politically Correct Language, is up in arms over the name White Sox.

Group director Flora Fay Sapiostick, 87, stated that the name White Sox is spelled incorrectly and in order to teach our children the importance of having good spelling, CEUPCL is demanding the Chicago White Sox organization acquiesce to their demand and change the name as soon as possible to the correct spelling which is White Socks.

Mrs. Sapiostick made a call to the team owner Jerry Reinsdorf, but he is an extremely busy man and he did not get back with her.

She was able to speak with Chicago pitcher Jake Peavey (#44) and she asked him what he thought about the group's demand.

Peavey, who is the highest paid team member ($16,157,271 per year) grinned as he chewed on some David's Sunflower Seeds.

He shook his head and then responded by saying that the White Sox have used that name since 1901, a total of 112 years.

Peavey spit out a couple of sunflower seeds and remarked that the Chicago Educators for the Use of Politically Correct Language have no business butting into the affairs of the Chicago White Sox organization.

The star pitcher then told Mrs. Sapiostick that maybe she had better go see her hair stylist and find out exactly why the hell her hair has turned blue.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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