Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 26 July 2013

image for Houston Astros In Last Place - Players Asking To Be Traded
George W. Bush reportedly has said that maybe the Astros need to change their name to something that sounds menacing.

HOUSTON - The Houston Astros are presently Major League Baseball's worst team with a horrific record of 34-67.

Sports Territory Magazine reporter Hiawatha Pamplona recently visited with Houston's top pitcher, Bud Norris at The Davy Crockett Barbecue Grill in downtown Houston.

Norris, who at $3 million per year is the highest paid Astro said that it is really depressing for the team to have lost twice as many games as they have won.

He said that he has never heard so many boos from their hometown fans. Norris pointed out that one day last week, the Houston fans even booed the Astro's batboy.

He then added that some of the more angrier fans are beginning to spell the team's name with a second "S."

Norris, who was born and raised in California, recently texted the owner of the Astros and asked to be traded to the Los Angeles Dodgers.

Other players that have requested to be traded include Florida native J.D. Martinez, an outfielder who wants to be traded to the Miami Marlins and another outfielder Justin Maxwell of Maryland, who wants to go to the Baltimore Orioles.

SIDENOTE: Hiawatha Pamplona reports that the owner of the Astros has said that he is not going to be trading anyone and if the players keep acting like they are unhappy and disgruntled he will take away their Gatorade, their dugout sunflower seeds, and their club house towels.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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