LOS ANGELES - The Los Angeles Lakers organization has stated that they are going to do everything within their power to secure the services of LeBron James.
Jeanie Buss, team owner, and fianceé of ex-Laker Coach Phil "The Pill" Jackson stated to the sports media that now that Dwight Howard and Metta World Peace are no longer members of the purple and gold team, something has to be done.
She said that she is tired of getting phone calls from Jack Nicholson telling her that if the Lakers don't start playing any better than they have been he will stop attending the games.
Ms. Buss said she assured Mr. Nicholson that she is trying her damndest to try and get LeBron James for the 2014-2015 season.
She also stressed that she is trying like hell to bring in some young players but having to pay Kobe "Vino" Bryant an unbelievable $32 million per season virtually leaves nothing in the so called Bring In New Young Players Fund.
Meanwhile Kobe has flat out stated that he will not take a pay cut and if the Lakers are hurting for money then maybe they should increase the price of beer, peanuts, popcorn, nachos, and sushi.