Written by queen mudder
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Saturday, 6 July 2013

image for Edward Snowden spotted in royal box at Wimbledon Men's Finals
Snowden captured on Wimbledon's Hawk-Eye, hacked into by the CIA

Langley, Virginia - Long distance surveillance wizards at the CIA's President George Herbert Bush Center for Intelligence [sic] HQ are studying latest imagery of US intelligence whistleblower Edward Snowden who has just been discovered in the third row of the royal box at Wimbledon in South London, sandwiched between the Duchess of Malfi and the Earl of Lower Slaughter.

The renegade appeared oblivious to the transatlantic undercover op which has seen a NCIS-style covert hook-up with the Hawk-Eye ball tracking technology operated at the All England Tennis Club to nail his presence at the 2013 men's Finals.

Meanwhile frantic counter-intelligence releases across the world have placed Snowden at a 5-star luxury hotel in Caracas where he supposedly arrived on Friday night inside a diplomatic North Face-off holdall dispatched home by the Venezuelan embassy in Moscow.

Commenting on the latest twist former Grand Slam champ turned tennis pundit John McEnroe let slip he'd earlier seen Edward Snowden chow down on strawberries and cream with Kate Middleton at the Wimbledon royal box's hospitality booth.

"WTF?" punditry colleague Boris Becker hissed at the McEnroe revelation.

Rafael Nadal's fungal nail therapist is 69.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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