Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 6 June 2013

image for A Lot of Major League Baseball Players May Find Themselves Playing Down in Guatemala
President Obama has said that there is no room for performance-enhancing drugs in baseball. (Photo courtesy of José Canseco).

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Strike two! And a lot of players in the Major Leagues could find themselves being suspended for 100 games.

A spokesperson for MLB, Hoyt Huckaback told the sports media that this is a very serious situation and a lot of teams are going to be hurt due to the fact that some of their players felt that cheating was the way to win.

According to Sports Bet Gazette reporter Zorro La Bamba one of the most well known of the players is New York Yankee Alex Rodriguez who at one time was the man in Cameron Diaz' life.

La Bamba spoke with Tony "Happy Guy" Boschm, the CEO of Biogenesis, the company that provided the performance-enhancing drugs.

Boschm reportedly said that he was just in the business of basically providing super duper vitamins to anyone who wanted to buy them.

He compared himself to a used car salesman who sells a car to anyone who qualifies and once the car drives off the lot he could care less if the car goes boom and turns into a friggin pumpkin.

La Bamba interviewed four of the players who could end up being suspended for 100 games and all four said that they will most probably go south and play baseball down in Guatemala.

SIDENOTE: President Obama is really upset at the bad publicity that these deceitful players have brought upon themselves and upon the national past time. He says that he may look into possibly having all of their baseball cards confiscated and burned.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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