Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 4 June 2013

image for The Miami Heat Beat The Indiana Pacers - LeBron James Says The Curse of The Louisiana Voodoo Woman Worked
Louisiana voodoo woman Madam Lottie Jo Lafayette uses a magic stick to cast her evil spells.

MIAMI - The Indiana Pacers and the Miami Heat ended up having to settle things in game seven of their NBA Eastern Conference Championship game.

And when the final buzzer sounded the Heat had won the decisive game 99-76.

Heat players Dwyane Wade and Chris Bosh picked a perfect time to wake up from their six-game nap. Luckily for the Heat they did because otherwise there is just no way that King James could have beaten the pesky Pacers by himself.

After the game Sporting Chance Magazine's Hercules Confetti asked LeBron if there was ever any doubt that his team would win the seventh and deciding game.

LeBron took a sip of his Mango Gatorade and said that there wasn't. He then smiled and added that the night before the game he had flown out to Louisiana and met with the world's top voodoo woman Madam Lottie Jo Lafayette.

James said that he asked Madam Lottie Jo to whip up an evil spell on the Indiana Pacers. The infamous magic spell casting woman asked him if he wanted the Regular Magic Spell, the Deluxe Magic Spell, or the Super Duper Magic Spell.

He asked her what the difference between the three was. She replied that with the Regular Spell the Heat will win by 1 to 8 points. With the Deluxe Spell they'll win by 9 to 15 points. And if he wants the Super Duper Magic Spell his team will win by 16 to 25 points.

LeBron told her that he wanted the Super Duper Magic Spell. After she finished working her bayou mumbo jumbo he asked her what the bill was.

"$400" she replied.

King James smiled, took out his wallet, and counted out ten 100 dollar bills and handed them to her.

As the Heat player turned to leave he told her that after they beat the Pacers they will be playing the San Antonio Spurs in the NBA Finals.

Madam Lottie Jo slowly shook her head. LeBron got a puzzled look on his face.

"What's wrong?" He asked.

The Louisiana voodoo woman took a sip of her Aye Caramba Beer and remarked, "Mr. James, doncha bother comin' back here again ya hear?"

He raised his eyebrows and with a confused look on his face asked "Why not?"

She grinned and told him that San Antonio Spurs guard Tony Parker had already been by to see her and the little Frenchman paid her $1,200 to put a Super Duper Magic Spell on him and the Miami Heat.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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