Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Friday, 24 May 2013

image for Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong Sell Their Business Venture
Just to show how unpopular Armstrong is, an autographed Lance Armstrong Bicycle Pump sold on eBay for 7 cents.

CHICAGO - Former sports figures Roger Clemens and Lance Armstrong opened up The Been There - Done That Private Detective Agency in February of this year and they've announced that they have just sold it.

Armstrong spoke with Cutter Shiloh of American Spotlight Magazine and admitted that it was a great big mistake. Shiloh asked the disgraced road racing cyclist champion what happened.

He took a sip from his bottle of Kiwi Gatorade and said that people just did not want to associate themselves with him and his partner, former Major League pitcher Roger "The Rocket" Clemens.

He added that when he and Roger first got together at The Crocked Crocodile Club in Chicago to finalize the plans things looked bright and sunny, but the sun soon left, the clouds came in, and it rained like hell on a daily basis.

Clemens pointed out to Mr. Shiloh that they figured that going into the private investigating business was perfect for them since there are no two other ex-sports figures who have dealt more with this type of endeavor in America or in the civilized world than them.

But as they say down in Mississippi, "Brutha, we was wrong a hell of a whole bunch."

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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