Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Saturday, 18 May 2013

image for Entire Minor League Baseball Team Suspended!
The Duluth Doodlebugs play their home games at Big Mac Stadium.

DULUTH, Minnesota - The commissioner of Minor League Baseball, Montague Bottlebiffer has just issued a three-game suspension for the entire Duluth Doodlebugs baseball team.

Commissioner Bottlebiffer stated that it was brought to his attention that during the recent game between Duluth and the Bakersfield Bakers all of the Duluth players were observed in the dugout eating Wendy's Burgers.

That is a direct violation of the Minor League Baseball bylaws since the sponsor of the Duluth team is McDonald's and in fact their stadium is named Big Mac Stadium.

Duluth team manager Howie "Wild Pitch" Voltencrisper told the sports media that he told the players to stop eating the Wendy's burgers but they said that they were hungry since the game was tied at 3 to 3 and it was in the 16th inning.

SIDENOTE: Commissioner Bottlebiffer has said that along with the three game suspension, the team will be fined $95, and it will be put on a four month probation. He said if a Duluth player is seen eating anything other than a Big Mac, a Quarter Pounder, or Chicken McNuggets the team will be fined $165, and it will forfeit the remaining games of the season.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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