Written by tennisman
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Thursday, 16 May 2013

image for Beckham announces retirement from modelling all forms of underpants
A Beckham lookalike modeling some pants

The modelling world was shocked today at the news that David Beckham had finally called it a day on his international underpants modelling career.

While many in New York, London and Milan had expected this news for some time, the announcement of his retirement is still a surprise especially when many were expecting at least a one year extension on his current contract with the top French Y Fronts company, Pants St Germain, based in Paris, who Beckham has been modelling for over the last few months.

Starting in Manchester back in the 1990's, Beckham began as a socks specialist and only made the step up to underpants when his wife, herself a top closet female footballer but better known for her facial scowling, developed in the catwalks of Banstead, pushed her husband up the modelling ladder.

A saviour of English underwear in numerous occasions including a holiday where he showed the Greeks how to 'wear a jock', as the expression became coined, made him famous as the man to follow as far as what undergarments were hot and those that were not.

On leaving Manchester and the UK modelling market, he moved to LA where surprisingly his underpants and 4 cornered knotted handkerchief combo product inspired from the beaches of Blackpool and Morecombe were a major hit, especially with the gay communities of Orange County.

Despite his commitment to the catwalk and the camera, Beckham loved to play football in his spare time and turned out wherever possible for top European sides, although critics wondered how a man who spent so much time oiling his 6 pack could still deliver a midfield holding role in Champions League encounters.

In retirement, Beckham has re-stated his commitment to his youth academies where he will train youngsters in dress sense while using football to fill in any gaps between time spent on how to sell yourself on Youtube and Facebook.

In Leytonstone, where it all began for Beckham, the Waltham Forest Metropolitan Borough Council have denied reports of a statue to be erected outside the town hall showing the modelling icon in underpants and socks.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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