Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Sunday, 5 May 2013

image for Kobe Bryant Hints He May Be Retiring
Kobe has reportedly told his friend Bruno Tonioli that he may just have dribbled his last basketball.

CUCAMONGA - Kobe Bean Bryant has made it abundantly clear that he is extremely disappointed at the fact that due to his injury and his inability to not play cost the Lakers a shot at the NBA title.

He is so upset that he told close friend Bruno Tonioli of Dancing With The Stars that he is seriously considering hanging up his jock strap and retiring.

Of course, that is all in Kobe's Lakeristic head because as even Jack Nicholson, the number one all-time Lakers fan stated, "Hey, let's be real here - true purple and gold round ball fans know that with the adversity of this year's Lakers, there was just no way they would even make it past the first round of the NBA playoffs with or without my esteemed amigo Kobe 'Vino' Bryant."

Comedian Zydeco Dupree recently stated to Regis Philbin on The Viagra View, that Kobe just has to stop living in his Cinderella-Sleeping Beauty world and quit looking at the sports proceedings from Rapunzel's golden tower in the sky.

The Louisiana comedian went on to say that Bryant has to leave the upper stratosphere and come on back down to the fog-laden land known as LaLaLand.

Dupree then commented that Bryant has to stop and smell the coffee, the roses, and the fajitas and understand that even the best cook in the world cannot make an award winning cake with ingredients such as ketchup, a head of lettuce, sardines, and food coloring.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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