Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Tuesday, 30 April 2013

image for The San Antonio Spurs Sweep The L.A. Lakers - Jack Nicholson Talking Rehab
Jack told Reggie Miller that he is proud of the basketball that Spurs player Tim Duncan autographed for him.

LOS ANGELES - TNT's Charles "The Fat Bro" Barkley and Kenny "The Jet" Smith have not been shy about telling it like it is where the Los Angeles Lakers are concerned.

The TNT Twins said that now that the Lakers have been swept four games to none by the San Antonio Spurs, the guys in purple and gold can all now get some beer, go fishing, and try and forget about the beating that they have just endured.

Barkley said that ex-Lakers Coach Phil Jackson is thrilled beyond belief that the did not take over the reins from Coach Mike D'Antoni as he wanted to a few months back.

Jackson told Sports Balls Illustrated Daily that if he had taken over the head coaching job he knows that he would have ended up in The Henry & Betty Ford Rehab Clinic for sure.

In fact SBID's Hercules Confetti said that he spoke with Jack Nicholson right before he left the Staples Center way before the game even ended.

He commented that the actor and number one Lakers fan said that he is feeling so friggin depressed that he may have to pay a visit to the Ford Clinic pronto (quick).

Jack said that at one point just after the half, Laker Coach D'Antoni asked him if he wanted to suit up and play for a few minutes.

Nicholson remarked that he'd love to but declined because he had a bruised uvula.

Coach D'Antoni then asked "Well how about that homeless-looking, bearded, old geezer with that silly hat who always sits next to you."

Jack started laughing and pointed out that the old geezer is famed record producer Lou Adler.

He then commented that Lou wouldn't mind playing but lately with the horrendous play of the Lakers, he tends to dose off for a few minutes every now and then.

SIDENOTE: Meanwhile Kobe Bryant the Lakers player-coach and head cheerleader says that he is going to have to take a serious look at the Lakers situation during the off-season and he may end up trading 2 or 3 of the players.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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