Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Monday, 22 April 2013

image for TV Sports Announcer Al Michaels Says The DUI Meter Was Broken
Al Michaels said that he only had 1½ cans of beer.

SANTA MONICA - One of the most popular television sports announcers in the entire country Al Michaels was recently arrested for having a blood alcohol level over the .08 percent legal limit.

Michaels allegedly told the investigating Santa Monica police officer that he blamed his car's weaving on the wind, the Santa Ana Winds which everyone who lives in Southern California knows can gust up to 93 miles per hour.

The 68-year-old Michaels is best known for being the announcer for Sunday Night Football, Monday Night Baseball, Tuesday Night Basketball, and Wednesday Night Hockey.

President Barack Obama has said that Al Michaels is the Christopher Columbus of sports announcers.

Al informed the arresting officer identified as Barney "Boo-Boo" Sullysipple, 51, that he felt that his DUI measuring apparatus was definitely broken.

The famed announcer went on to say that there is just no way in the wide wide world of sports that drinking 1½ beers could possibly register an alcohol reading level of .08 percent.

SIDENOTE: President Obama commented that he knows Al Michaels very well and he is inclined to believe that the alcohol measuring instrument needs to have the batteries changed because it is just not working properly.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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