Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Topics: Women, Tennis, Sport, Females

Tuesday, 16 April 2013

image for The Women's Tennis Coalition of America Vows To Make The Sport Sexier!
Effective May 1, female pro tennis players will begin wearing string bikini thongs. (Photo courtesy of Rico Chorizo).

NEW YORK CITY - The Women's Tennis Coalition of America has just voted on a directive that it hopes will help to increase the sagging viewership numbers.

Odetta "Babe" Zigmeister, 38, who is the executive director of the WTC of A issued a statement informing the fans of women's tennis that it has listened to their comments, suggestions, remarks, and opinions and it will be doing something to help boost the interest in the female sport.

Ms. Zigmeister, who just last week filed for divorce from her husband of 17 years, said that effective Wednesday, May 1, 2013, all female members of the Women's Tennis Coalition of America will stop wearing the standard tennis shorts and start wearing string bikini thongs instead.

Zigmeister noted that she is certain that this new directive will help to make the sport sexier which will in turn increase the viewership among males, lesbianites, and older straight women.

She told Dottie Bazooka with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily that The Swedish Women's Tennis Alliance has allowed its female tennis players to wear string bikini thongs for the past three years and viewership has gone up an average of 27 percent each year.

SIDENOTE: Ms. Zigmeister informed Miss Bazooka that two members of the WTC of A have protested the decision but they have both been told that either they get with the new sexy program or else they can simply turn in their resignation.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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