Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Thursday, 4 April 2013

image for Lots of U.S. Dads Would Love To Get A Hold of Ex-Rutgers Coach Mike "The Punk" Rice
Police standing in front of Coach Mike Rice's home.

NEW YORK CITY - Rutgers basketball coach Mike Rice has just been fired and rightly so.

The poor excuse for an adult was videotaped abusing his players by pushing them, shoving them, hitting them, kicking them, and even tossing basketballs at them.

It has been quite some time since there has been so much public outrage at the out-of-control antics of a coach who not only has no business coaching but who has no business being around young individuals who are trying to get an education.

Sporting Chance Magazine reporter Hercules Confetti personally stated that he would love to get into a boxing ring with Rice and after just two rounds he would turn Rice into Sugar and Spice.

Confetti said that he would enjoy paying Rice back for the way he mistreated, embarrassed, and abused his young players.

But Confetti is not alone because since the video of Rice's explosive court antics went viral there are literally tens of thousands of red blooded American fathers who would love to get a hold of Mike Rice and show him how it feels to be bullied.

Rice said that he was just trying to motivate his players in hopes of making better individuals out of them. Well as Rufus Reno with Sports Balls Illustrated Daily said, "Coach Rice seems to have forgotten that he was in New Jersey and not in Nazi Germany."

Reno pointed out that Rice's crazed antics make Bobby Knight look like Richard Simmons.

Barbara Walters stated on The View, that she would not be surprised if sooner or later Rice isn't hit with some kind of charges.

SIDENOTE: Comedian Zydeco Dupree stated that Rice must have studied lots and lots of Coach Woody Hayes and Coach Bobby Knight films.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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