BILLINGSGATE POST - If anyone wonders why Dennis Rodman was granted access to North Korean President Kim Jung-Un, we now know the answer.
After making headlines yesterday with his warning that his nuclear missiles are bore-sighted on Los Angeles, Washington and Austin, Texas, his emissary to the US, Dennis Rodman, announced that he received a twitter message from his new buddy stating that he would spare the City of Angels if Dennis could round up Laker courtside seats next to Jack Nicholson.
Rodman, who claims to have access to John Kerry, the newly appointed, slack-jawed Secretary of State, appears to have the credentials to help pull this off. Although one of his tatoos in the middle of his forehead says, "Don't call me unless you want sex," he said that he would answer a call from Mr. Kerry if it were a national emergency.
In the meantime, back in the White House, President Obama has his Secret Service agents posted outside his March Madness situation room with a sign that says, "PLEASE DO NOT BOTHER BARACK WHILE HE IS CHANGING HIS SELECTIONS."