Written by Abel Rodriguez
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Wednesday, 13 March 2013

image for The Houston Astros Decide Not To Change Their Name After All
A photo of Cullen Woodsteel, the original 1962 batboy for the Houston Colt 45s.

HOUSTON - The owner of the Houston Astros, Drayton McLane, Jr., has assured the Houston fans that contrary to what the rumor mills have been churning out, he has decided not to change the team's name.

Sporting Chance Magazine had reported that several sources had stated that the Astros name was going to be dropped and replaced by the name Oranges.

Hercules Confetti with SCM said that the rumor was born due to the fact that the Astros play in Minute Maid Park and someone had commented that the Minute Maid executives were wanting the name changed from Astros to Oranges in order to reflect on their product.

There was quite a bit of heated debate over the matter as evidenced by the fact that Astros pitcher Brett Oberholtzer (#65) had come very close to getting into blows with outfielder Brandon Barnes (#2).

Barnes reportedly liked the name Oranges while Oberholtzer stated that the name sounded much to fruity.

The team's batboy Wally "Spit Ball" Wagonette, 13, told the Astros radio play-by-play announcer Milo Hamilton that he would like to see the team name revert to the original name of Colt 45s when the team came into being in 1962.

Hamilton told Wally that he agreed with him but suggested that he keep his comments to himself or else he could be fired and then he would lose his nifty salary of $135 per game.

To view 2013 photos of every Houston team batboy from 1962 to the present go to www.exhoustonbaseballbatboys.gum

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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