Written by Ossurworld
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Friday, 1 March 2013

When an idiot becomes the ambassador of goodwill for a sport or a country, can war be far behind?

Submitted for your disapproval: Dennis Rodman, former NBA stalwart of the iconoclastic and tattoo as body billboard movement, now a goodwill ambassador for America.

Rodman just visited North Korea where he went to see Psy the Gangnam-style dancer. Alas, Psy lives in South Korea, which is sympathetic to the United States. Rodman's mental compass often points south to go north.

North Korea features a young despot leader for life, the notorious and mysterious Kim Jong-un who follows in the heels of his grandfather and father: men who moonlighted as mass murderers.

Rodman had dinner with the leader Kim, and they discovered much in common, both liking the NBA and both adoring Dennis Rodman. Kim apparently speaks English fluently and loves 1980s cheaters, bad sports, and loudmouth blowhards from basketball. He has become the #1 fan of Dennis Rodman.

Alas, Rodman knows only how to foul out. The Hall of Fame star known for his line of wedding dresses called his new pal "awesome," and they watched a basketball game together. Rodman has so few fans that he has to take them where he finds them.

In this case he went half-way around the earth, dodging those nuclear bomb tests to visit the country he studied from watching old episodes of M*A*S*H*.

If the United States has given Rodman approval to be a goodwill ambassador, then the State Department has taken up with the same ad agency used by the NBA. We can all sleep sounder knowing peace is being negotiated by a man who knows about fouling out.

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The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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