Written by Ossurworld
Print this
Topics: Red Sox Nation

Tuesday, 12 February 2013

Red Sox have started Spring Training with guns blazing.

Red Sox hot prospect Bryce Brentz shot himself in the leg last month while cleaning one of his myriad weapons.

Though this sort of careless gun care is usually reserved for NFL players at discos and NBA players on airplanes, the Red Sox have broken new ground with a player who said he was cleaning his gun and, surprise, it went off.

The Red Sox have told the young prospect named Bryce Brentz that he was extremely lucky. Actually, the luck all belongs to the Red Sox. This lame duck could have killed a teammate or even himself.

In an age when gun control is at the top of the list of everyone wearing a pink hat, Brentz has won fans from the diehard list.

The Sox admitted they have no policy for shooters on the team. Avid sportsmen often shoot themselves apparently, and no policy is needed.

Brentz will not be at spring training, and some wags have suggested this was his way to avoid having to play on a team that has shot itself in the foot several times in recent seasons.

The NRA has come to Brentz's defense and demand he be placed on the roster and be allowed to wear a holster in the dugout.

Until now Sox players have primarily advocated concealed weapons. The lineup generally has concealed all weapons in every game.

Ben Cherington, oblivious and supercilious GM, seemed unfazed with nearly having a dead rookie on his hands.

Make Ossurworld's day - give this story five thumbs-up (there's no need to register, the thumbs are just down there!)

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

More by this writer

View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story
View Story


Mailing List

Get Spoof News in your email inbox!


What's 3 plus 5?

9 13 7 8
48 readers are online right now!

Go to top

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more